iknowyouknow

February 13th

2012-02-13T23:49:00.003+08:00

slept at three in the morn
if it wasn't for titsy, my printer wouldn't have jammed.
Had math workshop in the morn followed by Intro comm in the afternoon.

today was Arwah che rubiah's 57th birthday.
i missed her, so much.
but momma wouldn't want to visit her grave.
i guess it really does hurt that much to lose a bestfriend..

cafe girls

2012-02-12T23:59:00.002+08:00

Karaoke session with le Cafe girls at Marsiling CC to celebrate Eta's belated 21st.
something scary came up in the evening.
Eta and i were alone outside and a door banged twice but we saw no one.
It was Maghrib, so we quickly ran to the lift.
Had dinner at Teh Tarik.
It was a memorable night though a little tiring.

So i guess i am going back to school for almost all the days for le workshops.
i need to ace UT3;
even though i dislike most of the modules,
i can't bear to repeat Year 1 or certain modules.
if i want to get out fast, i need to be persistent.
i know i can do it, it is just a matter of me wanting or not.

A compilation of words

2012-02-11T23:33:00.002+08:00

I fight my own battles, and the battles of those i care about.
Building up walls around myself,
because the more i care the more chances i get to be hurt.

Eyes blazing with feelings that words never express,
threatening my inner sense of security.
Why do i get the feeling like you don't need me anymore?

Page 40 of 366

2012-02-09T23:59:00.004+08:00

Y1S2 classmates.
Racist bastards they are, but united as one.
i am so grateful to have met them this semester.

Went to le Networking clinic, and Martin conducted it.
the clinic was a bit too fast so i shall go again next week.
i am really scared for the very last UT for year One.
what if i get my hopes too high and got a big disappointment again?
Easy, i shall not hope for anything more than just a passing grade. deal.
Got started on my revisions; now that is a first.
It is time to study smart; not study hard.

Today 3months anniversary with Syafrina la. ahaha♥

End of Freshman Year

2012-02-08T23:29:00.004+08:00

my thoughts exactly.

2012-02-08T23:11:00.000+08:00

The whole class partial-ed.
I don't know why i stayed behind.
Should have just gone and disappear forever.
i hated maths.

2nd last day with Y1S2

2012-02-07T22:15:00.008+08:00

Who you are, is what defines you.
Smile, even when it hurts.
The least it could do is to ease the ache, even for a while.
Believe in yourself, even when no one else does.
You only get to live once so, live.
It's harder to walk this world alone when some people choose to stay, while others just leave
You don't have to say goodbye forever;
because, "Together, forever, never apart. Maybe in distance, but never in heart."

i can't seem to write about anything happy.
All of the stuffs i 'd written are either sad or depressing.
This is the life i guess.

Failing grades for UT2.
Whathahelliswrongwithme!!???

1st-last day with Y1S2

2012-02-06T23:49:00.007+08:00

Completed the problem of the day during the first break.
then went off to Swensen's to have lunch with le classmates.
It was faci's treat. and we skipped 6P.

thought i heard fireworks.
jerked from my nap and father said it's the last day of CNY.
oh.
I've been having this weird, vivid and recurring dreams lately.
couldn't seem to interpret it.

Experiencing?
i feel..uncomfortable whenever i thought of that question.
maybe because i couldn't understand why you were on my mind when it happened.
and i can't seem to think of anyone else but you.
i wish i could figure it out.

3moredays..

2012-02-05T00:41:00.002+08:00

i love babies, but i feel so scared to play with them.
But today, i let my guard down.
and no, i wasn't trying to choke the baby,
she was practically trying to shove the spoon into her mouth.
and her little hands are much stronger than my right's. The hell.

Le FIDGETS.
had to force myself to get out of bed.
i was so exhausted it felt like i was floating to work.
and coffee does help to keep you awake.
Super busy even though there was only 1 party.
Sundays are story of my life.

So had dinner with le colleagues since it is Eta's 21st tomorrow.
Happy birthday in advance!

The Chingay Parade 2012

2012-02-04T23:57:00.003+08:00

crappy camera-china android; with Zahidah.
while waiting for the GOH to arrive..in a fancy-light boat.

Friday; February the 3rd.
Chingay, Chingay!
Team 14, 7 members.
saw Syafiqah in her formal attire;
so pretty, like model, cheerleader, something prettayy~
i was gawking, really. haha! anyway.

The first Chingay Parade.
i think my team has the least number of people.
It was awkward, since we don't really know anyone.
manage to mingle a little.
Our posting was okay;
The Arts Street, where we became the media's attention for a few minutes.
The entrance; we welcomed the GuestOfHonors.
The performers' entrance; where we welcomed the GOH again.
The Pink Sector; we watch about 45 mins of the show.
Took a short break then back to Arts Street to wish the people goodbyes.
rushed to catch up with the last train...to Kranji.
saw Aisha & Wani, we're literally stuck at Kranji in the middle of the night.
Thank God Che Yati fetched me.

Saturday; February the 4th;
The Final Parade.
Stuck at the Arts Street for hours.
so my team started to bond; we cheered our lungs out.
then we're off to greet the GOH at the performers' entrance.
off to the pink sector again to watch the parade, but we missed the finale.
This time, we get to cheer with the audience.
Then off to the Arts Street to bid farewells to the people.
We sing.we dance.we scream.we shout.we partayyyyyy!
Unfortunately, my team was one of the many motivators to stay & "halau" the GOH.
We were released at 12+, missed the last train.
Cab home with Syafiqah and Syafrina.

Hate it when i couldn't control my patience and it got to my temper.
humiliating, it was.
That is the other side of me i wish no one would ever see.

Page 33 of 366

2012-02-02T22:47:00.004+08:00

it's Day 1 of Chingay tomorrow!!
I am so excited but couldn't be with my friends so....................

Semester 2 is coming to an end, in exactly 4 days.
So i have minimal amount of time left to spend with le classmates.
They are one hellaoffaracistbastards.
We joked about chinese-malay during Math class today.
The facilitator today was "today, i shall treat you all like adults; own timing, own pace"
Was feeling really tired and sleepy in the morning.
Class was so quiet but by the end of the first meet,
everyone was awake and was so in-to the problem statement.

So i skipped training again, but i will go on Monday as promised,
and accompanied le Syafrina to shop for le formal clothes.
oh and baby is walking down the runway tomorrow!! stoked.

page 32 of 366

2012-02-01T21:15:00.007+08:00

finally a class photo together - 8.

It's le Formal day today.
felt ohso ladylike+TALL just for a day.
Had to present our proposal.
my team's presentation was awesome.
i DID NOT stutter, nor did i fidget, but my tongue rolled a couple of times.
tulah, benci anakeli lagi..
met Mia halfway so struggled with her to class in the morning.
worked on the proposal the whole day.
Got le chingay shirt, can't wait for the event itself.
Hope it'll be fun.

So, one of the reasons why i loathe to take picture is,
It'll make me feel so insecure about myself.
oh & my cheeks have grown chubbier. shittos.

favourite picture of the day ♥

Page 31 of 366

2012-01-31T22:31:00.006+08:00

Lana Del Rey ♥

A month has passed by so fast.
Final exams in 2-3weeks time.
I needa get my head in the game.
I need a good GPA; better GPA than Semester One.

So Networking class today was alright.
It was the last of it for the semester, and i am so relieved.
next week is going to be on revision.

After school with Syafrina.
it has been awhile since i went to visit Libby.
Looks like i'm going formal from morning til 6pm tomorrow.
and please, don't make me stutter during the presentation,
because that would be a full-blown humiliation.

Page 30 of 366

2012-01-30T21:50:00.005+08:00

Had breakfast with The Malays.
Evaluation was alright.
i was so scared of being plagerized.
had to edit le codes before we could go.
Left at noonplusplus, then went to G2000 with classmates.
Supposedly, Handball selection in the afternoon went shopping instead.
I sort of regret not going.
But in the end, after much procrastination, all of us skipped it.
Monday blues yo.

Last minute shopping plan with Haekal.
Poor boy had to follow me around.
took me so long to find what i was looking for.
I think the next time i want to shop for shoes, i shall go with momma instead.
She NEVER gets tired. Boys do. Boo.
walked around town for awhile, then head home.

So i am all set for the last Com Prac presentation, attire wise.
As for the live presentation of le proposal, hell no.

i suck at shopping.
i suck at making conversations.
i suck at showing my emotions.
i suck at making decisions, even the simplest.
i suck at giving people a chance to be in my life.
so i just suck at everything i do.
WHYOHWHY.

Choose your last words, cause this is the last time

2012-01-28T23:59:00.004+08:00

BOOOOO!!
So this is the end i guess.
No more Friday nights Chuck. No more Team Bartowski.
Goodbye Chuck!

Sometimes, people do scares me.
they don't talk that talk.
they just stab your back, as cruel as it gets.
Brave enough to start a war,
tails were turned at the end,
the closer you get,
the harder you fall.
What's not to care for the ones you love?

Wishful dreams tucked away in the shadows;
Maybe i was trying too hard.
Maybe i shouldn't care too much.
Because each time i do,
it only breaks my heart.
You never notice. You never did.

Take back every word i said to you.
Chase away the promises i'd come to,
You don't deserve me, no.
oh wait, you never had me.

Just run away & take your miserable lives far from ours.
There's no 'us' in the word Friends, anymore.

page 27 of 366

2012-01-27T21:10:00.006+08:00

It is getting tougher and tougher to live day by day.
School's been more challenging;
everything is not what it seems to be.
We can't always be too hopeful about things.

Now i just can't wait for it to end.

Felt very dampened during second break.
i was super shocked. too hopeful, i guess.
oh and UT3 is on the move.
I must not try my best, i must do wonders.
I don't want to be stuck in Year 4. nah-uh.

i need to sort out my priorities.

erase everything inside

2012-01-26T23:18:00.007+08:00

The many characters played by Johnny Depp♥

Math was torturous.
Hypothesis Testing was challenging.
snuck out with Felicia to buy le chocolate.

Finally had my frolicks.
oh and I've made my decision, for now.
Going to spend on clothes + expenses instead of Jessie J's.
Momma was fuming when i told her of my initial plan.
At least le father said Yes to me. i love you more Father.

So, next week is going to be a busy week.
Handball practices, Programming evaluation, KeepinItFormal-day & Chingays + Fidgets.
yey.
Speaking of which, i think i shall visit Betty's wardrobe real soon.
Hopefully i could find something that i can fit in.
Can't believe my aunt had grew much smaller in size since the last time i saw her.
i guess jogging really does help.
okay, she'll be my motivation-inspiration.
If she can, why can't i right?

Definitely not enjoying the silence.

because i'm no longer your muse

2012-01-25T22:36:00.005+08:00

Today was a nice day.
got a great CP team this week.
Proposal writing wasn't that bad,
but we have to do a live presentation of our proposal next week, formally.
we 9gag every few minutes, Joy kept coming and looking in our direction.

In dilemma; should i buy Jessie J's ticket or shop for clothes which i NEED badly. ?

they say family time, i say i wish.

2012-01-24T20:58:00.009+08:00

beautiful ♥

Chuck Series is coming to an end.
January 27th; le 2-hour series-finale.
No more Chuck. No more Team Bartowski.
But Nerd Herders will continue to live!

Anyway, its P14 tomorrow!
2 more weeks til the end of Semester 2.
Now i wish that time could move much slower.
i can't wait to get to school tomorrow.
All i've done for the past two days was isolating myself & into the virtual world.
I'm shutting myself down, not good.
Don't want to bring back those painful memories now, do we.

i want one of this!!

Knew this was coming,
but i didn't want to acknowledge it.
As expected, it did.
i guess immunity is no stranger to me.
Just like everything else, it's only temporary.

Page 22 of 366

2012-01-22T22:47:00.005+08:00

I can't seem to decide, should i let it grow or maintain the length?
I guess they're right, i do look like a sick person.

Another torturous day.
I was feeling cranky, still having stiff thighs, waddled like a duck at work.
too many anakelis today.
Le phone was being a bitch to me.
I couldn't switch it on since morning.
Eta gave us a van-ride home,
fell asleep as soon as my head reached the softness of le pillow.

was dragged to le "family reunion" at Orang-Orang.
we sat and drank tea-coffee while enjoying the cold night.
It's a good thing Che Sani and Che Yati are living with us,
more family time, i hope!
Abang KB helped to revive le Android.
lost all the application and contacts in the Internal drive.
saddest day of the week but at least i could still use le phone.
Thank you.

So, i'm not working tomorrow;
what am i to do??

Page 21 of 366

2012-01-21T15:01:00.006+08:00

After i grew out my hair ♥

Going to have a long break from school til Tuesday.
Thank God because these muscle cramps aren't healing any faster.
Infact it's getting worse.
Could barely get out of bed this morning.

Laze around at home,
catching up on the those tv shows i missed.
so i guess i am staying home this public holiday.

Happy birthday to my dearest cousin.
I'm thinking of getting her le Katy Perry's perfume;
she wanted Taylor Swift's badly.
i don't understand why she like her so much, really.

Page 20 of 366

2012-01-20T23:19:00.001+08:00

Walking to school was a great torture.
Sitting on the chair all day & having to get up to go to the toilet was even worse.
I couldn't remember when was the last time i had muscle cramps this bad.
though i still think Netball training is better.

Couldn't get much of today's Networking into my head.
After school chilled with le roommate.
Had Wendy's baked potatoes :9

9 more days to Jessie J's ticket!
Hopefully it's not sold out yet!

Page 18 of 366

2012-01-18T23:59:00.003+08:00

skipped a page.
A very busy day today.
Had Macdonald's breakfast with the people i love,
went in late for class; didn't want to but have to.

Threw up everything i ate.
Communication Practice today was relaxing.
Went to le Exibition, second break from 10:35 uptil 1:30
Life is good.
Networking UT was .

Had le Chingay training til 8.
Can't wait for the event on February 3rd + 4th.
Today is the submission date for le ASSignment II.
i didn't want to do it anymore but this Jimmy guy kept pestering me.
Did some last minute adjustments, left the errors be.
Okay, now can pray to God.

Page 16 of 366

2012-01-16T21:21:00.008+08:00

Communication Practice in the afternoon, Math in the morn.
Math killed every ounce of my brain cell.
i feel dead by the end of the day.

I threw up everything i ate in the morning.
Ran out of the class every few times.
Now my stomach isn't feeling good.
The weather is forever being a bitch.
I am extremely exhausted.

got sick and tired of seeing my wardrobe piled with unworn clothes.
threw most of it away.
Now i need to find some fresh ones.
Database tomorrow. Can we just fast forward to P15 already??

I miss frolick-ing.

Semester 2 is ending soon & I'd just gotten closer with my classmates.
why does it always have to be that way?

Page 15 of 366

2012-01-15T23:24:00.008+08:00

alalalala sweeet nyee menyampah aku.
watched this movie for the second time.
i shall watch it again soon.
peminat setia Maya Karin ye. Ye.

Hyped at work.
Thank God i went.
Found out that Haniz is going to le Jessie J concert too.
Was so excited we feelingfeeling.
I enjoy today.
I didn't like tonight though; every night infact.
So, two UTs this week, Handball practice on Thursday.
Oh and Fidgets is officially staying put.
This means i get to stay out of the house for those 3months-long break.
And i get to keep my wishList.

It has become an addiction rather than a temporary effect..

Page 14 of 366

2012-01-14T23:21:00.005+08:00

Francisco Lachowski ♥

Because my social life is officially taken over by the virtual world.
Spent my Saturday working on The ASSignment.
i think if i go on any further, you'll see me touching cockroaches.

so I guess i should go to work tomorrow,
share some fun and laughter before i go back to being..me.
heard Fidgets is not closing down anymore,
but is going to be "on leave" for awhile.
yey.

It's so hard to think optimistic when you yourself is a pessimist.
now what have i done?

Page 13 of 366

2012-01-13T23:10:00.004+08:00

Katy Perry's cat. LOL.

i miss manja-ing with B's cats.

So, Networking class today was easy.
Many peepees partial ed though.
I was attentive today, whasrongwimme..
Watched Ombak Rindu with le roommate.
I shall spend tomorrow working on the Ass and networking revision.
Friday the 13th was alright, but my left eye kept twitching.

because today, i proved myself wrong.

Page 12 of 366

2012-01-12T23:42:00.003+08:00

I'm eighteen going on nineteen,
still full of insecurities,
still a cutter.
still having doubts about my future.
what's new.

Page 11 of 366

2012-01-11T23:01:00.003+08:00

Visit poor baby today.
5days MC.
Now who doesn't want that?

Workshops to attend to.
Handball training starts next week.
two more UTs left.
Completion of TheASS by January the 18th.
Fidgets got shut down by January 31st.
I'm screwed.

Page 10 of 366

2012-01-10T19:14:00.006+08:00

Had some trouble with le sql developer in the morning.
My team was chaoticespeciallythechinas because today involved an active communication.
Forced myself to interrupt them every few minutes because they were conversing in Chinese.
Instead of listening to the class presentation,
Jimmy and i played leg of war.
The faci was pissed with us today. i guess it's a wake up call for all of us.
oh and itu anakeli faci is taking over next week's class.
he seems like a nice person.

So, instead of communicating actively on the worksheet,
le classmates were busy discussing about illuminati.
I heard that Neil Armstrong's first foot to the moon is just a hoax.
Please don't make me doubt NASA.

Turf city is closing down real soon.
does this mean it's the end of Fidgets or we get re-located or a 3month break?
nooo i needa money to get a new music player!
Foremostly, i can't stayhome for 3 months!

because reality couldn’t fix me.

Page 9 of 366

2012-01-09T23:08:00.006+08:00

WATIIIIII! mana lu!?

If my mind hadn't blank-out at those join conditions at the very last minute,
i could have completed my UT with ease.

So, math was *meepmeep*
did this fucktorial and dice questions.
Kevin had the gasakaulahnak attitude today.
No presentation, just 6P & quiz for the 3rd meeting.

Went to the course briefing on the selection of modules.
IT Service Operations seems really cool but the module chair told us
it has limited space but it is highly recommended.
I hope i get choosen.
The other modules are deadlyboringlyuninteresting.
but IT Service Delivery seem alright, maybe i should consider that if Operations reject me.

Had fast food after what feels like a long time with Syafrina.
Walked her home and took the bus home.
I love the weather today.

Page 8 of 366

2012-01-08T23:59:00.002+08:00

Mindfucked.

Page 7 of 366

2012-01-07T23:45:00.006+08:00

Saturday boring Saturday.
Wander around the neighbourhood.
Time flies really fast today.
Thought of doing le ASSignment and do some revision for Monday's UT.
wasted my 24hours staring at le screen & singing le lungs out.
so i have about less than 24hours to study tomorrow.
i can do it. i now i can. i just choose not to.
okay another new year resolution; i choose to.

my body has been feeling so weak this past few days.
i feel tired, all the time.
Anyway, i guess i am going to be busy with school this month.
So many dates to remember;
UT to worry about;
so many activities to attend to; one actually.
I can't wait for Chingay 2012!

So i was bored. did a little read-up on cutters/burners.
deep shit, i am.

Page 6 of 366

2012-01-06T23:59:00.003+08:00

i ♥ her hair colour & her music, still.

Partialed during 1st break.
studied Database instead.
Seng Ann said i look like an emo kid who listens to those emo/hardcore music?
i take that as a compliment, no?

because we hang like the kids of forever alone.
picnic by the train station.
if the weather wasn't that hot, i think it would be a nice & relaxing place to hang around.
It was Friday and still early.
Been awhile since i last had frolicks.

Page 5 of 366

2012-01-05T22:24:00.004+08:00

Didn't want to go to school in the morning.
Today's module was manageable.
There were about 15 peepees in class.
Le faci told us if we finish our work, we could leave earlier.
And so i did that. "partialed" with Syafrina.

Stripped in the bus and slept.
got home, feeling so weak.
did my rj and quiz and slept for 2hours.
woke up to a terrifying nightmare.
Some underground basement with witchcraft stuff.
i think i dreamt about this before.

Networking is going to be a bore tomorrow.

Page 4 of 366

2012-01-04T23:07:00.004+08:00

all grown-up now eyy?

It is Wednesday already.
Fourth day of the month-January, in the new year of 2012.
No more rain, no more grey clouds in the sky.
Perfect time of the year to go suntanning.
but i am not ready to go black again.

Had to write a letter/email about the ban on sugary drinks in campus.
Ridikulus but true.
Been awhile since i last done some Language-related stuff.
Though first and second meeting was pathetic, no mood to do anything.
So. after school went hunting with le bitches.
My chest hurt so bad i feel like i would faint any moment then.

Tomorrow is programming.
thinking of going to school but partial since many of my teammates are attending le Open house.
Partial or no partial?

January the 3rd.

2012-01-03T21:54:00.005+08:00

My desktop background image, my android wallpaper, my heart.
Zac, y u so hot!?
sorry but i just have to this. :9

Back to school wasn't so bad.
Database was yeeeeeeeshhh.
Had to do this little test-revision & i have forgotten my database knowledge;
SUBSTR especially.
Weather is always acting like a bitch.

Nappybusride. woke up to le anakeli sitting next to me.
I need peace kelis!
watched The Lion King when i got home.
shall watch TLG & PLL after i'm done with le daily routine.
oh and chuck season 5 is ending soon.
nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

Happy New Year! 2012

2012-01-01T11:59:00.003+08:00

I actually spent the day doing The ASS.
somehow the feeling of guilt is starting to grow upon me.
Plan was to stay home and do ma thang~
family was ~~
Didn't expect much.
in the end, was dragged to Clarke Quay by Kak Shiela.
New Year's eve wasn't so bad afterall.
We partied/shuffled at the Countdown party with many other strangers in the night.
Today was my first time celebrating/partaying in welcoming the New Year.

Went to Burger King Bar.
pretty cool shit.

Got home at about 3 in the morning.
Had only a few hours of sleep.
Everyone was a zombie at work.
Though today was not as busy.
Went shopping for clothes with Titsy after.
Haven't been sleeping well for days.
I am so frigging worn out.
school is in 2 days time, no?

Swallowed pride but spit out fire

2011-12-30T22:56:00.007+08:00

snipped & coloured le hair.
i think it is time to let it grow properly.

Soooooo. I guess it is a stay home New Year's Eve tomorrow.
Time flies super fast this year.
It has been the best year for me;
got to meet new friends, beautifully-crazy people they are :D
oh and i learn quite a handful of le IT stuff aka boring stuff.
some are fun, others pathetic(yes i'm talking about you programming)
Foremostly, RP's system is so fucked up.

2012, you gotta be be good to me,
i gotta be be good to you,
we'll be happy as can be
please be be good to me~

How do we go from here on?

2011-12-29T11:30:00.005+08:00

2D1N camp was alright.
Wasn't aware that many of my classmates were going.
Sentosa was boring but the Amazing race was fun.
But last night was the best!
after shower+dinner, played Captain's ball with le Campers at Agora Hall 2.
It has been sucha long time.
Injured le left knee, no surprise there.
Then it was the Don't Forget The Lyrics segment.
sabotaging. i got up and chose Last Friday Night.
confident that i could get the lyrics right, then i spaced out.
Couldn't sleep well. kept tossing and turning.
It was super cold but one minute it was really stuffy and hot.
Finally sleep came when it was about 3++ in the morning.

"You’re waiting for the old scars to go away.
While making new ones because you feel there’s no one here for you."
Got this off from tumblr. story of my life?

find what is real is what's inside you

2011-12-27T23:59:00.005+08:00

i want to be an angel. wait, who doesn't?

so far so good.
i have never been this persistent before.
i shall stop when i feel no jingling.
But,
Heads spinning.
Hungry all the time.
insufficent amount of sleep.
=
EYE BAG!

helllllllllllll no!
this habit has got to go!

sometime you can feel so small and its so easy to tell yourself you're not worth much at all.

Like poetry, i'm hiding behind the words i speak

2011-12-26T22:29:00.005+08:00

This lovely sister of mine snap le picture early in the morn.
i didn't know i could sleep like that.

Work was awesome today but..
Fine, i have to toughen up and stop letting people step over my head.
that will be on my new year resolution list.
Niggas bring boombox with their homies,
we brought speakers with our homies.
Blasted the music; we did the boobie workout.
Was unaware of the surroundings, til a male customer came up and it was awkward.
F&B is cool! *le pose*

The Ass. The revision. The fats. BURN.

Merry Christmas

2011-12-25T23:59:00.003+08:00

Got to see the Christmas lights.
Human traffic was uncontrollable.
I could only describe the night with one word; Awkward.
The chocolate thing, oh woah.
I guess i am still a newbie when it comes to this kind of thing.

Apart from the awkwardness, i like tonight.

breaking Sunday's dawn

2011-12-25T04:21:00.004+08:00

jogging doesn't help. it's only a temporary effect.

i need to find a better alternative.

its haunting me, i hated that year. traumatising, still is.

i need to believe that the possibilities are still out there, waiting.

self-inflicting won't do you any good.

yes, it made you feel better, but it never will make you stronger.

i'm afraid. i need a miracle.

Rescue Me

2011-12-24T23:59:00.005+08:00

got called in 12 to 6 today.
have yet to start on my revisions.
fuck The Ass.
fuck school.

fucktard. I knew what my problem is but i keep denying it because i don't want it to be true.

cocoa pudding FTW

2011-12-23T23:59:00.001+08:00

Abercrombie & Fitch feels like one of the scenes in Nikita
Dark and annoying.
My ninja mode was turned on through out.

Night-crusing with Titsy, Kak Shiela & abang Kb.
Hookah on an empty stomach.
Threw out everything when i got home.
Feels kind of coolL~ actually.
But the feeling sick part, na-uh.

Prata hotdog at GoGo Franks is le delicious!

Liars turn me on

2011-12-22T23:59:00.004+08:00

was bored, so i came up with a little somethin-somethin.

I used to say that you are the only one i could rely on
you are the reason i'm standing strong
well, not anymore

These eyes, this heart
they've seen, they've learn
the only person close to reliable, is me

Every part of you in me, was erased
Every memory of you, were forgotten
a trip down the lane,
a reminder of my existence.
You didn't destroy me, no.
You just made me stronger.

It's a pity those promises were left broken
You said it yourself,
what are actions without words?
well, actions speak much louder, my friend.
why would you care then?
because next to the word liar, is you.

I used to say that you mean everything to me,
that you are my forever
well, not anymore.
because these eyes, this heart,
they've seen, they've learn
that the only person close to destruction, is YOU.

Alexandra Udinov

2011-12-21T23:59:00.013+08:00

Alex Deleon ♥

Woke up at noon
Watched Nikita Season2 the night before and still watching.
seriously craving for le Twister fries and Frolicks.

so, i finally downloaded the craps for the ASS.
stared at the list of stuffs that is needed to be done,
it feels like my nerve cord just got cut off.

I got a two-day camp next week.
i'm feeling stoked-nervous.
Finally a school camp after 3 years!
The last camp i've been to was the Leadership camp at Changi.
The most enjoyable part of that camp was le kayaking experience from Changi-EastCoast-back.
& that little incident where i scraped my right shin against those ugly rocks
when we wanted to stay clear from the storm & out from the kayak
but failed because i was too short to reach the platform.
Oh and the night walk, super bulu-raising; enough said.

shall get those black studs tomorrow or Friday.

the dream

2011-12-20T23:52:00.004+08:00

downgraded from suite to a bunk.

sharing room with titsy from now on

ahh hell yeah~

Thor was awesome. seriously can't wait for The Avengers!

ohh i wish to see the christmas light.

i had a dream

it was vivid, as always.

i loved it, and i wish it would go on forever.

except that it wasn't mine.

it wasn't me.

bummer.

are you lonesome tonight?

2011-12-20T00:40:00.005+08:00

what am i doing?

i am just upsetting myself even more. guess loneliness is really hard to bear.

volvere~

because sometimes, nobody cares as much as you do.

Just like 2008

2011-12-17T21:28:00.004+08:00

"so when negativity surrounds, I know someday it’ll all turn around."

live life hard

2011-12-16T21:47:00.008+08:00

I thought today was Saturday.
preettay much at home the whole day.
Played Pokemon,
went back and forth to le shop
Wet weather, didn't get to jog today.
Saw Eqah, exchanged hellos-talked a little.
Missing Macd's times with her. Now everybody's busy.

Christmas dinner at Hyatt on Monday with le Fidgets crew.
I seriously got nothing to wear.
shall go hunting tomorrow.
but le Tits and Fits working!
I hate shopping for clothes;
but shoes, that i love.

How ironic.
When I told myself that i missed you and then last night,
you chat with me out of the blue.
Not complaining.
I kind of miss the moments we spent,
No matter how much i would deny it.

still hurt

2011-12-15T22:39:00.010+08:00

The best last day of school before le 2 week break.
Kelvin was really nice today.
He said he feels lonely because two teams were missing. Gay.
No team presentation, released us at 2pm.
I prettay much didn't do anything today except the worksheet & ps.
spent the remaining few hours watching Soul Surfer.
It was such a touching movie and really motivational.
I want to learn how to surf. I wish to migrate to Hawaii. I don't need no education.
I miss the heat burning up my bare skin.
Foremostly, i miss the tan lines.

And i still miss you, especially when i'm alone.

In the Mourning

2011-12-14T23:30:00.006+08:00

Communication Practice today was terrible.
faci spent about 40mins drilling us with questions.
i was irritated with Melissa today.
Kept interrupting me while i was presenting and kept snorting at my face.
I don't usually talk bad about people but she's an exception today.
i don't know what had gotten into her, for the first time she seem so in-to doing.
I hope it's not just an act.
Girl, you need to keep up!

So tomorrow is the last day of school before the 2week break starts
Most of my classmates are going to be absent.
Should i?

Christmas dinner + exchange of gifts with colleagues on Monday.
Have yet to decide what to wear since the dinner is going to be at Hyatt Hotel.
Have yet to get le christmas present for Philip!

You can't really fix a heart.

i refuse to sink.

2011-12-13T21:43:00.008+08:00

Ma sexy beast turned blonde. Not awesome.

Feelin' fresh & high today.
Theory for Networking today; i prefer theory to practical.
watched Number 23 after school.
completed a 3km jog. for the first time in a long time.
I hope i could make this a daily routine.
I want Nicole Scherzinger's abs and a fit body. perasan
Not going to stop until i feel no fats suffocating me.
Talk is cheap, but i hope i would put in extra effort.

on the way home,
i randomly dance to le mp4 player on the streets
and nearly knock into someone.
i don't know what's gotten into me today.
Singapore is boring. Come dance with me stranger oii~

13.12.11

so be it, if that's what i am.

2011-12-12T22:33:00.007+08:00

ME.

Today was rather a boring Monday.
Programming is forever a shittos.
I guess everybody is sick of school already.
And everybody is looking forward to le breaks.
I am not.

felt disgusted with le fats in which i call it body coats just to make me feel damn good about myself,
i decided to go jogging since there was no one at home.
It did help to lose some tensions too.
except that my respiratory system is getting worse.
oh and ASSignment 2 for Java is out.
I have yet to look at it, i wish i could skip it though.

Mother, i wish to trim my hair.

moments that didn't last forever

2011-12-09T22:38:00.007+08:00

There are no perfect couple. The fights just keeps them stronger.

Walked around the house with my new shoe. i got swag.

A good revision for database today.
Though it was so boring.
Worked on the worksheet the whole day.
Freakout with Reimi for every few questions.

After school to Lot One with Fadzly & le bitches.
Syafrina and i bought le converse highcuts.
so happy i could die.
finally i own a converse shoe.
Then went off to Cineleisure to check out le skateboard.
Had bffs then trained home.

I am officially exhausted.
Sometimes i wish i could just collapse and fall into a deep sleep.
And escape from reality for awhile.

I wish those moments would last forever..

scars to heal

2011-12-08T23:32:00.006+08:00

got home at about 12-1plus in the morn.
Had supper at le Rasa-Rasa Seafood kedai with la familiasS~
had no appetite to eat big so i just ate le chicken satay.

one by one they go,
leaving behind memories and scars
so painful yet thrilling once
always & will be remembered...

Take One Last Breath

2011-12-08T19:00:00.004+08:00

Math today was boring.
Didn't really do much.
Had time to watch In Time in class.
Today was the free Starbucks Christmas promotion.
queued up and got le Mocha Frappe~

Going visiting later.
Thank god i'm done with my rj.

I manage to resist the urge to mimis today.
i'll try to go for a week.
i've done it before, i could do it again. #self-motivation

Al-fateha to my uncle. I hope he is resting in peace now.

Minds at war

2011-12-06T22:04:00.006+08:00

Math UT is tomorrow.
I've covered only 1 out of 8 problems for my revision, so far.
Networking today was hell!
it's tempting me to drop school.
Weather was scorching hot.
anyone could get heat stroke anytime.

December 6th; it's been a year.

The toilet, my saviour.
I don't know why I couldn't hold it this time,
It was the only place i could turn to, at that point of time.

Angel With a Shortgun

2011-12-05T23:34:00.007+08:00

Hopefully i could pass le Java ASSignment.
Networking tomorrow.
left with 5 more problems for this semester.
that means i have 2 months to get #Operationloseweight back on again.
Hopefully cravings won't come in the way..
Who am i kidding.

I miss you but i don't wish to say it.

The Emptiness

2011-12-03T21:56:00.007+08:00

If you think i am a boring person and i possess no emotion,
DEAL WITH IT.
I am your sister.
I just don't wish to speak to ignorant people.

zeusaresposeidonapolloheraclesathena

2011-12-02T20:43:00.002+08:00

Immortals was fucking awesome.
Rachel bailed; what's new.
It wasn't as gory as i thought.
The weather was perfect.
I wish i could stay out late tho.

i've always loved the Greek Myth.

onceinabluemoon

2011-12-01T22:08:00.003+08:00

I can understand if you tell me you can never be there for me all the time.
At least make an effort to show that you still need me in your life.
The least i could do is to still hope that one day,
we can have all the time in the world.

doyouwantobeontop?

2011-11-30T23:50:00.004+08:00

boomshakalakah~ ADRIANA LIMA ♥♥

Alessandra Ambrosio & Adriana Lima. my twofavourite Angels♥

Restless and fat.
i wasn't into doing Communication practice today.
My team was so excited while preparing for the third meet.
We were like mice squeaking while other teams were presenting.
The day was alright, i guess.
After school watched Rec2 in the library.
Had KFC roller snackers for dinner.
Was feeling really agitated with my fats+broadshoulder+doublechin.
Ahh le insecurities.

Ended up jogging on the spot for halfhour in my room.
was feeling lazy to go jog around the neighborhood.
a good alternative, i hope?
For the first time since whenever, finally had my real exercise.
I could taste the salt in my perspiration.
I must do this more often.
I want a body like any Victoria's Secret model!
oh god those abs and arms and legs. * le drools*
Watched Victoria's Secret Fashion Show 2011 with Titsy.
I was in awe through out the 40+mins.

I couldn't find my I ♥-hate you shirt.
Shit, it's my favourite shirt!
Please please be in kakShiela's wardrobe.
Searched high & low everywhere for it. ;'(
It's the only memory i could wear with.

today is different

2011-11-29T23:16:00.005+08:00

I didn't give my fullest attention to Networking today.
Was webcaming with le Syafrina, tersengeh-sengeh sendiri.
and feeling really sleepy and tired.
Faci kept looking at my team & there's this one time he went upclose to my face
and asked if i'm wearing glasses with lens because Qibo wasn't wearing any.
OKAYYYY MARTIN.
Today was a rather sad day.
Martin shared with us emotional videos in the morning,
Aidil switched on ballads-80s-90s music.
Sucha sad atmosphere.

Though, i thought i talked a lot for 3rd meeting today;
trying to deter from being questioned because faci
was asking each & everyone of us tough questions.
He did not ask me so i hope it is a good thing.
Thought of playing Dance Central afterschool with le peepees but
the gameroom was occupied with soccer freaks.
played Wii for a while then home alone.

I got my first A for Programming! so happy i could die.

Like bloodlust, i was craving for it;
i feel so vulnerable it seems as if looks can kill at that point of time.
so foolish, i was.

Regrets and mistakes, they're memories made

2011-11-28T23:59:00.000+08:00

Another day another waiting game
A little different but it's still the same
I am here but where's the one I'm longing for?

I'm having troubles feeling all alone
Will my heart ever find a home?
I want to hope but sometimes I just don't know
I know I'm not the only one

So you sing a lullaby
To the lonely hearts tonight
Let it set your heart on fire
Let it set you free

FireFlight - For Those Who Wait

deafening silence

2011-11-25T22:04:00.005+08:00

Le F&B Fidgets <3

Le last UT was terrible!
Stared at le MCQs for a couple of minutes & just le scrolled to the last question.
I do hope i could pass this module.
Oh went to collect le altered jeans.
Was pissed off. I knew that aunty made a mistake.
My booty ain't that big woman!
i shall send it back tomorrow!
I am so not satisfied. kalau boleh malam ni jugak mahu hantar.

Oh Breaking Dawn Part I with Fadzly & le bitches tomorrow.
Stoked.

Walked under the beautiful night-sky with le Syafrina.
Didn't want to go back early so i accompanied her home.
Blisters burning from under le plaster.
No more le sexy leg for weeks :(

dontknowheretoturn

2011-11-24T21:53:00.006+08:00

"I've been stuck in this routine,
I need to change my ways,
Instead of always being weak."

is there anybody out there?

2011-11-23T23:53:00.005+08:00

Nadine Coyle.

I got less than a week to complete le ASSignment.
I must finish it by Saturday.
One last UT on Friday; Data Comms & Networking.
Hopefully the afternoon talk tomorrow will help.
Oh and tomorrow's module is Math. Bitch.

The Saturday's Missing You is playing incessantly in my mind.

youshotthebulletthatkilledme

2011-11-22T23:58:00.005+08:00

Ended Networking early.
Went to le library to play le Wii & Xbox Kinect.
Le Dance Central is awesome.
Le perspired and dance like crazy with le peepees.
It was embarrassing but who cares.
I shall ask Nabbit to get it so we could dance & sweat like pigs.

Programming UT was *meep meep*
At least a pass then i'll be relieved.

it gets intense when you're too attach to someone..

Michael Copon

2011-11-21T21:52:00.008+08:00

My Sundays are officially my le terkangkang day.
Exhausted, very; Physically and Mentally.
I needa break from school~
I want to go CAMPING!!
I focking miss being away from home for a couple of days,
being in the sea, kayaking from East Coast to Changi and back.
Eating camp food, sleeping/moonlighting with friends..
ohh le beautiful memories~

Anyway, watched a couple of movies last night.
Rec 2, Conan The Barbarian.
I was really sick to the stomach by the time the show ended.
The blood, the goreness. mind blowing.

Networking class in the morning and Java UT in the afternoon.Tomorrow is going to be a great day, i'm sure of it.
Feeling unwell.
Have yet to complete on my Java ASSignment.

chuck me.

2011-11-19T19:14:00.005+08:00

STAY HOME SATURDAY mathafucka \mm/
Cleaned my bookshelves.
Threw away most of the stuffs.
Went through le old diaries and my life was really that depressing.
Those words "i'm feeling depressed" in every entry.
Puck you ah girl, you destroyed 1/2 of my teenage years.

Been on the laptop almost the whole day.
I shall work on my Java assignment later.
But for now, i shall conquer the tv and watch my tv showss.

Paint Your Target

2011-11-19T16:20:00.023+08:00

We were this thing you called us, "Best Friends Forever."
Everything was so perfect but you had to pierce the moments.
First there was four.
And now it came down to..zero.
One by one we go,
leaving scars, but not even a memory to remember by.
so much of Forever.

"Don't try to push the blame on me."
Then tell me, if it wasn't for you, how did we get here?
You took me under your wings;
Only to find them, concealed with lies and deceptions.
I've seen too much already.

Listen,
I wouldn't take a whisper if
that's all you have to give
Take your pretty little mouth plus your tales and
tell them to those who would believe.

So foolish of her,
giving away another chance.
One bad move, the ship will sink again.
But the choice is not mine to give,
Don't come looking for me if the first one trips.

Sometimes, when you have nobody to count on,
you could easily do the things you wouldn't while you're still conscious.
That is what loneliness can do to you.
Fight it,
find someone who is willing to be there with you.
Be it a lover or even a friend,
At least they're not trying too hard to keep it real.

Though i couldn't forget
just my echo, my shadow
were the only friends that I had.

Dear ex-bff.

Stay with me

2011-11-18T23:44:00.006+08:00

Peter went through le UT Answers for Database.
I am no stranger to making ridikulus mistakes.
Today's problem was about creating le ERD Model.
It was fun.

They asked why i was quiet today.
I didn't know how to answer.

After school with Fadzly & le bitches at the library.
Had dinner at Seah Imm with le Fidgets colleagues.
I was so hungry i think i gobbled up the food.
So, i guess it's a Stay Home Saturday for me tomorrow.
I shall clean out my room and then work on my assignments.
Do some revisions for the upcoming 3UTs next week.
NEXT WEEK. 3UTs.

They don't see the beauty in you like i do..

thatfeelingyougetwhen

2011-11-15T23:59:00.001+08:00

I think i talk too much, sometimes.

hellocoldworld.

2011-11-14T21:19:00.005+08:00

NOVEMBER BABY
Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and
dangerous. Wild at times. Knows how to have fun.
Sexy and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towards
your inner and outer beauty and independent
personality. Playful, but secretive. Very emotional
and temperamental sometimes. Meets new people
easily and very social in a group. Fearless and
independent. Can hold their own. Stands out in a
crowd. Essentially very smart. Usually, the
greatest men are born in this month. If you ever
begin a relationship with someone from this month,
hold on to them because their one of a kind.

Technically been working on OOP the whole day.
I am currently trying to solve the assignment which is due on the 28th?
School today was really crazy.
I felt like my head could burst anytime.
Went for SB with le SB buddies.
manage to munch on waffles for lunch & then continue with my work.
It was only until i got some sugar rush i could think and do my work properly.

After school with le Syafrina.
finish up on my program.
it was a cold wet night.
I was freezing.
Database UT in 2 days time. i am unprepared.

streetlights

2011-11-13T23:16:00.003+08:00

very.

neverforgetmy18th.

2011-11-12T21:37:00.001+08:00

A surprise celebration of le belated birthday.
B knew i was very hungry yet she stalled and bullied me.
Kept asking if i want to go Nabin's instead.
turns out, Zahir and Ganesh were there to surprise me.
It was a nice surprise despite me knowing.
Yes, i suck at surprises, one of the reasons why i'm not fond of it.
Thank you for the treat & presents yos~

It wasn't such a nice night though.
Your thoughts triggered my emotions.
It was hard to accept the fact but I must be fair.
Because life is unfair that we need to put up with the balance.

masyalllaahh.

sickmuse.

2011-11-12T21:16:00.002+08:00

The way you talk about him,
And the way he is acting,
it's like deja vu.
And when you asked me that question,
it was easy to give you an answer.
But it wasn't easy to hide the feeling.
Unfortunately, like always, you never notice.
I just wish you would.

When he asks those silly questions not because he is asking too much of you,
because he really cares about you and is really afraid of losing you, ever again.
I know, because i felt that once.

Be grateful that someone actually wants you in their life.
Stop living in denial.

ifeellikeicouldlosemymind

2011-11-11T20:34:00.006+08:00

11/11/11
Nothing special has happened.
A little dull, though.
oh well.

It was all nothing but the truth, and now i am afraid. would you still love me tomorrow?

Loga-loga

2011-11-10T23:14:00.004+08:00

Tired, Restless and Stress.
Logarithms was tough.
Had no idea what dear faci taught us, or at least i think he did.
Had a lot of help from Syafrina and JF(tak tahu spell nama)
Manage to understand the concept a little.
So, studied/chilled at Bishan Library with ma bitches.

Train ride forever meepmeep.
Database tomorrow.

Green Lantern on my birthday.

2011-11-09T23:59:00.000+08:00

the best 18th.
though there were no bigweddinglike wild parties,
no big and manymany presents,
no booze to get high on,
no drink and drive,
no movingoutfromyourparentsplace,
i just don't care.

I'm just blessed that Allah is still giving me a chance to live through every single day.
Thank you.
A very big thank you to the people who had wish me.
To le peepees, thank you for the pleasant surprise,
plus the 3rd meeting msn conversation.
My stomach hurt so bad from trying not to laugh out loud.
Harry Potter selling cabbages at Geylang, i am.
You people are annoying but fun.
And to le bitches, thank you for the endless wishes.
Not annoying at all and sweet :)

So, afterschool Frolick-ing with Fadzly & le bitches.
had dinner at Nasi Ayam BB central.
I am deadbit. I should sleep now. Goodnight.

merci beaucoup.

DComics

2011-11-07T23:46:00.005+08:00

COOLL~ Day spent with le bitches at Town.
Tidak sempat belajar. :D
Had lunch at Swensens ION and then we roamed the streets.
Finally got a replacement for le thunder ring.
Have yet to fix le owl ring.
bought this really awesome Green Lantern singlet at DComics store.
I shall shop there again one fine day.
oh and thank you Syafrina & Syafiqah for the cooll~ wallet. ^^
Had a really awesome day.

So, homed with another surprise.
There, sitting on my bed, a Flash & Splash plastic bag.
Got another wallet from le cousins.
oh and my day was not all awesome, though.
Momma just had to spoil the mood.
le sigh.

Dadday, thank you for tonight; it was very convincing.
you're turning a year older on the 9th.
i love you.

Paranoia

2011-11-03T21:28:00.006+08:00

She is so beautiful and with that voice..

School has been pretty hectic lately.
Emotions over mind.
Bonded with le peepees, harder modules day by day.
Had my first UT for the 2nd Semester today.
It was pathetic. i never had enough time to complete maths questions.
Even during my O level days.

Database Problem 5 looks easy.
But it's hard to apply the concept to today's problem.
I really do hope it would get better the next following weeks~
Taufiq said this is just the beginning of it.
It's killing me softly~

I miss threesomes. :'(

Le weekend.

2011-10-30T23:39:00.005+08:00

It was a tiring weekend.
went to Mustafa then to Somerset then back to Mustafa on Saturday night.
Tits kalau tak dapat barang dia, hari itu juga dia mahu.
bus ride with Tits was, nice.
We talked from the moment we boarded the bus til we alighted.
We talked as if we didn't for months.
It was nice, i wish we could do this more often though.
got home at midnight.
did le catch-up with my tv shows, since sleep wouldn't come.
I was a walking zombie by Sunday Morning.
Cafe wasn't crowded.
Went to H&M later in the night.
I feel tired but i can't seem to fall asleep.
Oh and there is school tomorrow.
And first UT of the sem 2 on thursday.
i have yet to study.

Received such a heartwarming text. Now i know, that i am not in this alone.

TGIF

2011-10-28T22:37:00.004+08:00

Wanted to have lunch with le peeppes at LJS during 2nd break.
but decided against it.
Zero appetite.
so, stared at the screen throughout the second meet.
feeling ohso pathetic.
asked for help from some people, MNL me.
In the end i manage to execute my own program.
worked with Mia,

KFC after school.
Bought le hotdog waffles.
Homed early.
Watched Green Lantern; Thor failed on me. must download it again.
oh and i just realise that my ring looks like green lantern's. #feelingfeelingsuperhero
oh am going to download my tv shows + movies tomorrow.
Stay Home Saturday i guess.
Going to finish up on Safe Haven.

you're vile & cruel

2011-10-27T21:55:00.005+08:00

I manage to complete the worksheet( -1) for database by myself.
oh and i manage to teach my teammates.
i suck at teaching but at least they got it right.
i think i have accomplished something right today.
Today's class was so fun i didn't want to eat my lunch.
Had Tuna sandwich with Honey Oat bread for lunch. le delicious!!
took a halfhour break from database & chilled with le classmates.
We sat at the next door class and watched funny video clips.
We bonded over noodle cups. Epic but should do that more often.
Presentation was smooth-sailing, faci was nice today.
He mumbled, so we mumbled back.

So, after school met with Libby.
borrowed a couple of books.
Le Stefan's Diaries Volume 2:Bloodlust
oh & i finally found The Lying Game: Never Have i Ever!!
I've been waiting for months.
done with TLG S01, have to wait next Fall for a new season.
Upnext, NIKITA S02! oh & Chuck S05!!

I guess i'm pretty much used to it by now.

You're not easy to love..

2011-10-25T22:38:00.013+08:00

I ♥ this GIF. i could like stare at it & never stop smiling.

Today was maths.
The faci is making me feel more and more meep-y.
He likes to click his heels like a Nazi officer.
SO dramatic and youcaninsertmorehere.
Felt so restless during the first & second meet.
Half-hearted to partial but someone held me back. ^-^
Oh, and Haekal sent me le Sims 3 !!!
I could like hug him & kiss him butnoican'tbecausethatwouldbeinappropriatedontyouthink?
Then Haekal, Chetwin and i debated about Sims.
No life, indeed.
Went to this 1CEpoint talk at the Forum with le Syafrina after school.
25.10.11 Subway, Eat Fresh. le Chicken Teriyaki with Hearty Italian Sandwich.
It tasted like heaven & hell.

I got to work on Deepavali tomorrow.
I need some rest.

I want this for my room please.

Will you still love me tomorrow?

2011-10-23T20:12:00.006+08:00

Le Sexy beast<3

Tonight, i realize that there is no such thing as forever & always.
Either you in or you out.
There is no place in the heart that says, "Come & go as you please."

No matter how much i deny it, but,
my sister is a true role model when it comes to friendship.

foreveralone.

2011-10-21T22:12:00.007+08:00

Ian Somerhalder.

I guess i am not the only one who doesn't like to stay at home.
School is the only place where i could be happy,
laughing like there is no tomorrow,
hanging out with my friends, and just be free.
As if all the problems are flushed far away from me.

But I feel so alone when i'm at home.
Everyday is a struggle.
Every night is tearful.
How i wish that life would be easier to live.
An imaginary friend that's all i have.
But i need more than just a fantasy.

So, today was Java-programming.
I struggled a little more than before.
Apparently, Java partner wasn't in school for the first & second meet.
So i was flying solo.
I manage to complete my codes though.
but i still don't get the whole of Java.
After school went to bowl with E36F at CSC.
Initial plan was to go for the Haunted House at TRCC but it starts in the evening.
Had dinner at MacD's.
More programming to do.

You were never there when i needed you the most..

you Monster.

2011-10-20T22:23:00.006+08:00

UT is like in 2-3 weeks time.
And i am already preparing for the worse.
I am really scared i couldn't cope with the modules.
I don't want to pass for the sake of passing.
I want to pass, knowing and understanding the objectives of the modules.
Java you suck. Be nice to me, will you?

Had sushi with le Syafrina and then studied Programming at BB's Central MacD's.
For a couple of hours, i felt so sure i could ace it;
as if all doubts has been cleared.
Then when i came back home,
and tried to revise on it,
I feel like sucha dumb person.
I have a very very bad memory.

Database was bad.
Third meet was atrocious.
Class made a lot of mistakes.
I manage to understand about 75% of today's lesson.
The difficulty level has increase for each modules, gradually.
And then, tomorrow is TGIF.
I have Programming on every TGIF.
This is so depressing.

Renegade.

2011-10-19T22:11:00.010+08:00

*headbanging* put your rock horns up!

Communication Practice was manageable.
I just realize that TRCC sells lasagna.
I am going to try it tomorrow.
I don't know why i am afraid to go to school.
I don't want to learn all these IT stuffs.
It is scaring me.

Had Frolicks after school.
Today was just okay.
I'm dead beat. I need my rest.
Hold on, i don't know what it means anymore.
School for 5 days of the week,
The only free time is on Saturday and have to work on Sunday.
I'mma foreveralone so i don't really mind my everyday routine.
But i hate it, sometimes.

What's happening to me?

i miss my bestfriend!

2011-10-18T22:13:00.003+08:00

Today's module was fun.
Math was fun, surprisingly.
Ate Texas Chicken after school.
I really need to stop eating fast food.
It was raining when i was on my way home.
Yay.
Went home and Momma cook le nasi goreng ham.
Oh tomorrow is Communication Practice.
Looking forward to it ^-^

Something's a little off.

Is that too much to ask for?

2011-10-17T22:11:00.007+08:00

Why do people keep disappearing from my life?
Sometimes, when i need them the most, they just couldn't.
But i am always the one, so eager to be there when they're in need of someone.
Why?
i just want to feel the love,
is that too much to ask for?

Having a sister is like not having one at all.
All i'm asking for is just a sisterly time with you.
Maybe someone in the house to talk to, laugh with, just when i feel like it;
But all i'm getting is once in a lifetime opportunities.
is that too much to ask for?

I feel so selekeh today.
Monday bulus, seriously in no mood to go to school or do work.
Feeling so tired and sleepy.
Bonded with my teammates a little more than usual.
oh and third meet was terrible.
I wasn't sure if my presentation was alright.
The facilitator today was a bit crazy.
He cracked jokes in the morning but when it comes to le 3rd meet,
he starts firing highstandardquestions to every team.
whadddapuckman.
oh i've learnt that he is just our temp faci.

After school MacD's with Fadzly & le bitches.
Had McSpicy with cheese meal.
whatever happened to no more fastfood?
i guess my hunger gave it away~
went to le IT Help Desk earlier to fix my lagging laptop.
been there four times, one more strike left.

I miss my bestfriend too much. when was the last time we hung out? a month ago?

Happy Lemon.

2011-10-16T22:59:00.000+08:00

My own bestfriend ditched me.
I am so depressed.
but it's okay, i am so used to it.

Went to Peninsula with le Syafrina on Saturday.
Bought a band tee.
1 = 4.
2 = 8.
should have bought the Beatles white tee!
i shall buy it the next time!
Anyway, wanted to go to ION Orchard but we ended up at Bugis.
wanted to walk from City Hall to Orchard,
but we got lost.
Furthermore, the weather was a killer so we tried to stay indoors.

Had to work on Sunday.
It was tiring even though there were not many customers.
I feel like fainting when i got home.
I felt tired but i couldn't sleep.
Oh and there is school tomorrow.

le megan fox.

2011-10-12T21:03:00.001+08:00

sexayyyyyy foxy momma~

Today's module is fun because i have awesome teammates.
Manage to interact with some classmates.
I think i shall be the scribe often.
Need to talk a lot. and type a lot.
Oh and today, i discovered that Mia can sing/rap!
i showed them a video of an 8yearold kid in tutu rapping to Nicki Minaj.
and Mia was rapping along and then she showed us her youtube videos.
le awesome.

So, after school with Fadzly & le bitches at MacDs.
Watched half of Ringer.
She looks so old!
Oh and i am sick of school food.
Ate almost the same thing for a week.
I can gain so much weight in a week, no in a day.

It's only been the first week of school & i learn that hypocriteS are lurking around in my new class. Not awesome.

Irene Demova virus??

2011-10-10T22:25:00.005+08:00

Francisco Lachowski.

Data communication and Networking was hell~
Never thought it'll be this tough.
Let's just hope i won't do the same thing as i did with Programming Sem 1.
Given up halfway throughout the weeks.

Anyway, ate le 7-11 hotdog bun.
Fuhhyohh so thick and juicy and long!
i have to brag about it because it taste awesome.
shall eat it again or maybe le mac & cheese..
So. after school went Frolicking & le Sushi with Fadzly & le bitches.
Oh and my laptop is dignosed with le virus.
I think it is time for me to visit le IT Help Desk first thing after 1st meet tmr.
Please don't die on me.

91011

2011-10-09T20:45:00.006+08:00

I miss going out with my friends.

9-6 today.
so many Le anakelis today.
le speaking-speaking british english ada,
le keling slang ada,
le tidak suka.
Fit and I curse blakang counter je.

i manage to take food orders well,
i can't wait for le coffee making.
Oh and there's school tomorrow.
Starting with Communication & Networking.
Oh god, more IT stuff. loving it.

Anyway, i want to go to some Halloween party this year.
sounds exciting and thrilling!

I think i need to interact more, be less selenge-looking with my new classmates.

we're on hot & cold.

2011-10-08T23:06:00.002+08:00

October 5th. We fought.
October 8th; at 12:59am. We made up.
We fight, we break up.
we kiss, we make up~~

I'm glad but feeling a little scared/paranoid.
So, work got cancelled for today.
Went and get my hair cut.
Have to work tomorrow, so i need to sleep early.
Oh and my laptop is focking*british slang with me.
And my HDD is acting crazy too.
When can i finally get to ace all these IT stuff?
i want to know how to administrate a computer system;
i want to know how to fix broken computers.
i want to le feeling-feeling computer expert. -.-

SO. The first week of School was alright.
Always looking forward to after school.
My new classmates seem a little, off?
My first day was awesome, because we interacted well.
The second was, quiet. But i manage to score a B grade.
And the third, i manage to befriend Felicia a.k.a The eyelashes girl.
We did Java together, we stressed together.
but she did most of the talktoyourself thing.
i just sat there and silently laughing to myself.
On the third day, i had learn that there are plenty of clubbers in my class.
Dangerous.

Anyway, I just realise, I've gotten a hair cut for about 3 times this year, so far.
One in Jan, the other was somewhere in July-August?
And now in October. So the next one should be in April 2012 i guess?